Goal Setting

It is a new school year. What are your plans for this year? What are your goals for this year? Sure, there are academic goals, like: We are going to finish the 3rd grade, but what about character goals? Or have you considered goals for reaching a milestone in your child’s life? When we are homeschooling, sometimes, we can spend too much time thinking about the academic goals for our children. It is good to have a goal like: this year I’m going to finish the ENTIRE math book. But sometimes a goal might be:
this year little Johnny will get potty trained, or we are going to focus on learning about spending quiet time with God every day.
Goals can also be more specific; the kids will learn to hang up their coats when they come home. I have heard people say that it takes 28 days to make a new habit. If that is true, what habits do you want your children to learn this year? With a 9-month school year, we have 9 new monthly habits that each child could learn, if we choose to focus our energy there. How much time do you spend looking for shoes before it’s time to leave the house? What if we poured our energy into training them up front rather than spending time in the frustration of trying to find shoes when we leave? If we choose 9 things that really drive us crazy and consciously focus on them, what peace would you find in your life after 9 months? It’s certainly easy to say, but the execution can be difficult. To help children develop a new habit, try these steps:
1) Identify the task to complete over the next month
2) Talk to your child about the task, make sure you cover every expectation. Once my daughter thought that clearing the table didn’t include picking napkins up off the floor because they weren’t on the table. And she was serious. It never occurred to her to pick up the napkins off the floor. Setting clear expectations up front will help everyone in the future!
3) Practice the task (yes, come in from the house and hang up your coat). Repeat this task 3- 5 times while you are watching. This can come with some attitude, my kids would say, “Mom, I know how to hang up my coat.” They would go through the task grudgingly. Set it up as a positive experience from the beginning. Say something like, “I want you to practice walking in the door and hanging up your coat. We will do this 5 times and then you can have a popsicle.” Some would call it bribery, but they know up front the expectation and the reward for successful completion.
4) Now you are ready for the first test. Don’t remind your child, go about your normal routine.
5) Each time you walk in and the task isn’t accomplished, ask your child what they forgot. This can be an important time to not tell them that they forgot to hang up their coat. You want their brains to grow neurons and make the connections themselves, so let them think about what they forgot. Be patient with them.
6) When they remember PRAISE them for remembering.
7) Keep working at it until it becomes a habit
8) Pick the next habit to work on
Setting up these goals for our children can be a blessing to everyone. It takes time to think about them, but our reward is a peaceful home. Good luck and may God bless your efforts raising up your children.